While regular conversation is enjoined between couples, especially to foster better understanding when it comes to discussions about sex, experts say the choice of words can worsen a bad situation, or even be regarded as totally rude and therefore damage a relationship.
A new study published in the Journal of Sex Research warns that the words you choose may have more of an impact than you think, hence the need to take warning.
Researchers asked 293 married people to fill out questionnaires about their sex lives, how often they talked about sex with their partner, and how satisfied they were with their marriage.
People then looked at a list of 44 sex terms — split into clinical terms like “labia,” erotic words like “climax,” slang like “give head,” and dirty stuff like “pussy”— and rated how frequently they used them when talking about sex.
Surprisingly, the more couples used sex slang, the more satisfied they felt with their relationship and sexual communication.
However, they warn that there are certain dirty words you should never say to a naked woman.
What are those words? These ones…
• Ass. Instead, say ‘backside’ or ‘butt.’ Experts say using the word ‘ass’ to describe a woman’s assets is a no-no.
• Balls. Sex experts say that as a man, if you’re old enough for a woman to see your private parts, then you should be bold enough to call them what they are — testicles.
• Eat out. Oh, this is not talking about having lunch or dinner together! Rather, it’s still about the old, good sex! Oral sex, that is. So, say this instead: ‘I want to taste you.’ Yes. Like that!
Research has shown that women who are more comfortable with their genitals are more game for oral sex — and they orgasm more, says sex researcher, Dr. Debby Herbenick. So, if you frame the act in a positive light, that shows her you enjoy it, and she’s more likely to let her guard down.
• F*ck. Never! Instead, say this: ‘I want to bury myself inside you.’ Experts say though this four-letter word can work if the mood is right, if you’re not on the same page, however, asking her to “f*ck” may come off as cheap and emotionless.
• Tits. This should not be used to describe a woman’s breasts! Call them the real name: breasts. If “tits” is a little too porno for your style, “breasts” is a more tasteful term to incorporate into your foreplay.
And don’t use the equally bad ones such as hooters, knockers, fun bags, jugs, cans, or the twins. You may use such words around your guy friends; but if you compliment her giant “jugs” when she first whips them out, prepare to get slapped.
• Dick. Well, experts believe that penis is better, mature and sexy. This is because, in a new study, “penis” was the seventh most popular word out of 44 terms, so you’re in good company.
And please, don’t call it the magic stick! Otherwise, no woman would ever take you seriously if you asked her to roll a condom down your “Magic Stick.” Keep it classy, man.
• Pussy. Call it vagina. As with penis, calling it by its proper name is still very sexy. When it came to popularity, ‘vagina’ ranked 17th out of 44 in the Journal of Sex Research study.
And be warned, no tags such as box, hole, twat, c*nt, etc. Use the wrong dirty word and you end up jeopardising your shot at future sex sessions, so stick with ‘vagina’—except, of course, if she feels cool with such words.
• Cum. Instead, say ‘bust or get off.’ Whispering in her ear that you’d like to “ejaculate inside her” may not sound as hot on the receiving end. These two are neutral enough to relay the message.
Thursday, April 25, 2019
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